At a Craigside Christmas many years ago, someone gave a copy of “Juggling for the Complete Klutz.” I have no idea who the giver and recipient were. It’s not important. Unless it was your prezzie, in which case I have your juggling balls, and I’m not giving them back.
For the next few weeks, we all developed excellent bending-down-and-picking-things-up-again skills. We knocked over drinks, (almost) smashed windows and, in one moment of ineptitude that haunts me to this day, dropped a high one on Wotcat. He was not pleased.
The outcome of all this prestidigitation was that I learned to juggle three random objects. A fun, if largely worthless skill. Until today. We pottered over to the Story Bridge Hotel for the usual Sunday afternoon entertainment. As on most Sundays, there was a promotion running. This week it was for Bulmer’s Cider. Awesome. A pair of the inevitable young ladies in tight t-shirts were offering a challenge: Juggle three apples and get a free glass of cider. Jackpot. They gave us a glass each. Happy. (It’s actually a damned good cider – would drink again, even if I have to juggle for it.)
So, let that be a lesson for you. When you are late for your Differential Geometry exam because you’re practising your juggling, remember that smoothness proofs never got anyone a free cider.